Fat Wars

Recently I was at an international kink event. Approximately 2300 people attended. So being that 2300 people were there – along with my many experiences with kink events both small and large, I must say I’ve noticed a common theme at kink events.

What is this common theme you ask? It’s called, fat, yes FAT, a lack of self respect, and a large dose of wayward self dignity.

I’ve already told you – I’m not Cindy Crawford. I have my own weight issue and my weight goes up and down like a see-saw. However, before I step out the door, I actually look at myself in the mirror and I say something like “do I look the best I can right now, today? ” Or “do I look like I’m going to dig a ditch?” Or, “have I changed clothes and showered – AND washed my hair in the last few days? ” Perhaps my personal favorite would be “are these clothes so tight that if I sneeze they’ll explode off my body and kill a person standing 25 meters away?”

I’m into eye candy – and yes I get that not everyone in not into my type of eye candy (though they should be!). At this event, there was eye candy thank the Goddesses, but it seems to my jaded view that increasingly there are less eye candy types and more of the fat, lazy, trailer trash looking types.

Oh, it’s not about money. Don’t start that with me! I can hear you from here! Read along you simpering crybaby.

Let’s start with grooming basics. Start at the top – so to speak. Do you need a haircut? I’d say that for no more than $20 you could get a haircut. No, you don’t have to pay a stylist $150, we’re talking only baseline grooming tips here. Then, after you get your haircut, go home, get into the shower and wash everything. Wash you hair, your face, your entire body. I believe both genders should shave it all, but again, at a minimum please shave your legs and your underarms ladies. Were you raised by wolves perchance? Not doing simple grooming is sheer laziness. If you can't afford soap and shampoo, then you can't afford an ISP and you aren't reading this.

Then comb your hair, shave your face if you need or want to, and if you’re a woman – please oh please, could you put on makeup? Just a bit? Lipstick? Earrings? Any effort is appreciated. Having a toothbrush with toothpaste on it that meets your teeth is also advised.

Yes, fetish clothes can be expensive. I’ll buy that (and might already have done so ;)). But here are a few ideas that are inexpensive. Black. Yes, just black. Buy a basic black pair of pants or a black skirt. Buy it in your size – the size that fits for whatever size you might be. If it doesn’t fit, I swear to you, it won’t look better if you squeeze your ridiculous self into it - thereby revealing every lump, bump and roll you’ve ever had. If you’re not skinny, the tight look isn’t for you and that’s okay, you can still look good. Buy a matching black shirt or blouse. Match that with a basic pair of black shoes and stocking/socks. Viola!!!! I find that at events, if there is a vendor selling clothes the temptation to purchase clothes that do not fit, are not flattering in any way must be overwhelming.

I think the general thought of kink being all inclusive, total tolerance, etc., has brought out everyone, even those from under rocks. They’re all signing up right now. Fetish, kink, BDSM, it’s all the rage. Every white trailer trash bozo has entered the scene. Events are relatively inexpensive to attend, and truth be known, where else could these people get a date, or attention of any kind? 99% of us wouldn’t give these people who assault our senses a second look.

I think basic grooming failures indicate a lack of self respect, and a lack of self dignity. As my aging mother said about a close friend of hers that developed Alzheimer’s “her family took her on an outing and hadn’t even brushed her hair, poor Sally would have just died when she was well to walk out the door without brushing her hair”.

When you’re at home, feel free to wear those ugly, non flattering ultra tight clothes, and don’t bother washing or combing/brushing your hair. Your dog or your cat might not care, but I sure as hell DO. Truth be known, if your pet could talk, they'd likely tell you how you insult their senses too!!!!

In your spare time consider your self esteem and dignity issues – and no, don’t bother me with that, just fix the problem.

I’ve been having trouble with e-mail, if I haven’t responded please be patient.

Yours very truly,

Isabelle