Character

A reader has sent a most interesting letter. This new dominant has raised a common question. He asks how can one attend a play party with their submissive and play with them if they do not have a collection of impressive (expensive) toys? This question reminded of a conversation I overheard a few years ago.

The conversation took place at a play party. It was between three dominants who were temporarily suffering from testosterone overload. They were being blowhards and doing a lot of posturing. They spoke of their toys. One remarked that they would not be seen in public with a certain type of toy made by a certain person. Another commented that another type of toy was only of quality if it were imported from a specific village. The third blowhard stated that in his 20 years of experience, a person could not consider themselves a master unless they were totally expert with yet another type of toy.

I walked away from that conversation feeling that perhaps it was the excess testosterone that caused all three to miss a very important point. It is the character, not the toy that makes a master or dominant. The character of a dominant or master is never measured in terms of the costs or workmanship of his toys or outfits. Character is measured in terms of who they are and what are their core values. Character is the key measure of a dominant or master.

Forget blowing the bank account on that latest super toy. Work on the character. If the character is weak, it won’t matter if the person shows up at a play party with the latest violet wand worth hundreds of dollars. Sure, some submissives will be interested in the toy but they will have little interest in the dominant if the character is weak. A dominant of solid character can show up at a party with no toys at all and be treated with immense respect.

A new dominant does not have to go out and buy a bunch of fancy toys. Very effective toys can be had for extremely modest costs. There are many places on the Internet that show how to make even the most diabolical of toys cheaply. A new dominant may do well to develop a fertile imagination which will allow him to see the potential of very ordinary things. For example, my slave has developed a particular fondness for a bamboo cane I purchased for the princely sum of $0.69! It has brought her pleasure for years.

Remember, there is no value in playing the blowhard game. There is immense value in maintaining a peaceful domain filled with the love of a contented slave.